I was reading in another list an imaginary gift list for our fav. SG team and it got me thinking (uh oh!). Then, I was writing a christmas card and it had a funny thing on it and THAT REALLY got me thinking (run for your lives!). So this is for you guys, just for Christmas.....
TOP 10 THINGS TO SAY ABOUT A CHRISTMAS GIFT YOU DON'T LIKE: (SG style)
What Jack Would Say:
10. Thanks for the gift.....you never DID like me, did you?
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9. I thought they BANNED these things already!
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8. Great gift if it was given to me when it was still in fashion.
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7. I would wear this right now for you, but I gotta go on a mission to P3X229...
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6. I love it....but I'm sure Teal'c would LOVE it even more....
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5. Gee, I hope I don't lose this while I'm on my mission to P4J190, I can be SO absentminded on another planet...
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4. I hope this doesn't get damaged like my other shirt when that alien probe (Message in a Bottle) stuck me...
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3. As part of the military institution, I can not accept bribes. Sorry...
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2. If I wear this, the aliens on the other planets might get offended...and we wouldn't want to ruin any diplomatic relations now would we?
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1. Oh for crying out loud, what the #@#% is this?
TOP 10 THINGS TO SAY ABOUT A CHRISTMAS GIFT YOU DON'T LIKE: (SG style)
What Daniel Would Say:
10. Oh...um, this is interesting...
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9. This looks like something I had found during a dig in the Yucatan.
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8. Perhaps Teal'c would appreciate this more...
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7. Maybe it'll look better once I put my glasses on...
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6. Thank you, but I'm probably allergic to it...
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5. Gee, I hope I don't lose this while I'm on my mission to P4J190, I can be SO absentminded on another planet...(Jack told him this one last Christmas...)
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4. I hope this doesn't get burned up from a Go'uald staff weapon blast or something. You know how that can happen sometimes...
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3. I think I should just...well...maybe if...um...thanks.
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2. Thank you but I usually like to travel light when I go through the Stargate.
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1. Oh, sorry. I thought it was an artifact!
Man, the things I do when finals are over.....=)
TOP 10 THINGS TO SAY ABOUT A CHRISTMAS GIFT YOU DON'T LIKE: (SG style)
What Teal'c Would Say:
10. Is this a standard Earth gift?
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9. Many appreciative thanks for this...gift
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8. Perhaps O'Neill would appreciate this more...
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7. This may get accidentally destroyed during a Go'uald attack
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6. This would not match my Jaafa tattoo
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5. I hope I do not lose this while I am on my mission to P4J190, I can be so absentminded on another planet...(Daniel told him this one last Christmas...)
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4. Thank you but in Chulak we do not celebrate Christmas (mentally thanking the gods for it...)
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3. Thea krat zah yuck! That is ...."thank you" in my language.
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2. This would not go with my infant Go'uald larvae.
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1. In my culture, I would have been within my right to dismember you for giving me this gift!
TOP 10 THINGS TO SAY ABOUT A CHRISTMAS GIFT YOU DON'T LIKE: (SG style)
What Sam Would Say:
10. Actually, I wanted the Major Matt Mason Astronaut doll....
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9. This would not go with my tank top number...
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8. Perhaps the colonel would appreciate this more...
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7. The wormhole might eat it...you know how unstable those fluxuations are...
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6. Thank you but I had one just like it...only more tasteful
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5. Gee, I hope I don't lose this while I'm on my mission to P4J190, I can be SO absentminded on another planet...(Teal'c told her this one last Christmas...)
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4. Maybe I'll give this to my clone in Harlan's planet...
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3. I'm an astrophysist, not a clown!
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2. Hmm...maybe the To'kra would like this instead....
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1. Holy Hannah! Is that thing for real?
© 1998 The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-I, the Goa’uld and all other characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd. Partnership. This fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant for entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author.